What Doesn't Work: Perfection

Most of my life, I have expected perfection from myself and everyone around me. There are all kinds of nature and nurturing reasons "why" but the truth is that I was just an ungracious mess. My inability to accept imperfect people around me (hello, humainty!) made me lonely and grumpy. My inability to accept ME made me harsh and, well, grumpy.

By (sloooowly) changing my expectations from perfection to excellence, I have been freed from the weight of never being quite good enough. Grace has turned my life assessment upside down by teaching me (again, sloooowly) to celebrate the victories instead of cursing every inevitable screw up.


Basic example: Under perfection, I would not blog because I might make a typo. And some of my posts might be lame. And my photos are dreadful. And it's weird.

In real life: Under perfection, I am a constant failure of a wife and a homemaker. My grocery bill should be lower and my dinners yummier/healthier/timelier. My husband should be more pampered and certainly better loved. My house should be organized and my dog walked more often and, seriously, my holiday decorations better organized.
These are the kinds of things perfectionism requires of me.


The sneakiest part about perfection is that if you're type-A enough, you can fake it for a really long time. As in my particular case, you can fake it until you don't quite know where you end and the facade begins. Scary.




I got a tattoo on my wrist last December that just says, "Grace." There's a great tri-fold reasoning for this permanent sentance but, really, the one place I most apply the reminder is for myself.

Hey, Amanda, hotdogs for dinner (for the second time this week) totally counts as cooking. Relax.
Remember how you forgot the laundry again and now the basement smells like a gym locker? Well, that's why laundry soap was invented. Run it again, Kid.
I work too much and my homelife suffers. I concentrate on home and I'm distracted at work. Yep. That's the stuggle for balance every working woman (let alone momma!) faces. It's okay.


I don't know much about what works for balancing life and being who I say I want to be and cooking and making my home inviting but I'm really super awesome at identifying what doesn't work and perfectionism is the biggest. Stay tuned for more.